Accepting the truth or The Real True Picture is one of the most difficult steps when dealing with domestic violence. Victims and abusers both struggle so much with this. Why, because we have been told that this crime only occurs to families that are poor and unsuccessful in life.
The stereotype for an abuser is a person who comes from a bad home without opportunity. Maybe someone who is uneducated and unemployed.
For the victim the stereotype may be a meek person again living in an environment without a future. A poor family living on welfare with many children.
Neither of these are true. There is no stereotype. Domestic Violence can happen in any family, any economic class, any race and can be in any profession. It makes not difference where we come from what makes the difference is what we have learned in our lives. What we learn will become our beliefs, our behavior activated by our beliefs. This is true with all of our behaviors.
What behaviors are you teaching your family? Is it something that you would be proud of or is it something you would not want anyone to know about?
If you answer the latter then it is time to challenge those beliefs. That is the only way to correct bad behavior. This is not an easy task especially when it comes to domestic violence. Why, because we all know it is bad, so bad that we refuse to accept that we could ever do such a thing.
The very first step in stopping domestic violence is accountability. Admitting that it is happening is so hard for both victims and abusers. We do not want to be “that kind of low life person”.
Sadly it will continue until there is accountability. Even more sad someone will be hurt both physically and emotionally until there is accountability. Someone may even die without accountability. Even worse the cycle will continue .